Just like the title says, my wife and I are putting our almost-17 year old puggle down on Friday. Over the last couple of years it’s started to seem like he was developing dementia, difficulty hearing, and he’s lost the ability to go to the bathroom on his own. He doesn’t really enjoy playing with any toys anymore and has no interest in going for walks with us. His legs have also gotten really stiff and he struggles to get up and down the steps on his own and he can’t jump up on our bed or couches anymore. There are days when he seems totally fine, aside from having no more control over being able to go to the bathroom, but overall he seems like he is tired and not himself anymore.

We’ve done our best to provide the best nursing to him that we could between changing his diapers and carrying him up and down the steps when he needs help, but it has recently become incredibly difficult to give him the care he needs after having our second child a couple of months ago, in addition to our four year old son. He has kidney disease and a UTI currently but it doesn’t seem like his body is totally shutting down, though our vet has said even with intervention it will only be a matter of time before he gets sicker. So between that and the decline in his overall quality of life, we talked with our vet a few weeks ago and made the decision to put him down this Friday, so we could make the most out of the rest of our time with him. At the time it felt like it was forever away, but now it’s only a few more days.

I’m not really sure if I’m posting this to try and help myself with coping through this process or just am looking for someone to validate our decision. I have been a wreck about this, especially for the last couple of days. He’s been with us for 15 of his 17 years and has been around for so many significant milestones in our lives.

In making the decision to end his life, I feel like I am letting him down, like we are making the choice more because he is too much of a burden right now rather than what is really best for him. And I guess that really is part of the reason this is happening, but I feel too ashamed to admit it. I am also very nervous and unsure of how to talk to our four year old about why he won’t be around in the house anymore.

I will miss him and love him forever, and I will never forget every good thing he taught us and brought into our lives.
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