private static boolean giveUpOnMember(Membership<InternalDistributedMember> mgr,
      InternalDistributedMember remoteAddr) {
    return !mgr.memberExists(remoteAddr) || mgr.isShunned(remoteAddr) || mgr.shutdownInProgress();
  }
creates a new connection to a remote server. We are initiating this connection; the other side
must accept us We will almost always send messages; small acks are received.
geode-core/src/main/java/org/apache/geode/internal/tcp/Connection.java